Good morning, October. People are muttering casually about turning their heating on, and the path by the pond is littered with a thousand fallen sycamore seeds. Strong winds have blown in a sense of something new, an autumnal rebirth. But far from being chaotic, their blustered whirls have worked to organise the leaves more efficiently than any human.
September came and went with its usual, simplistic nuttiness. It’s hard to believe the kids were still on holiday just a month ago, and a flurry of meetings, new clients, and bitty tasks depending on feedback have made it a fragmented and distractable few weeks, but not in a bad way.
I made it to one of the Brighton indie game dev meetups, my second time heading along, after feeling good that I’d managed to finish making a trailer for my game. I’m nervous and excited that the trailer should be appearing in the next Community Direct, but have been sneaking a few previews out to people in the meantime. You can view the trailer here! Now I just need to actually crack on and finish it…
Weekends have been mercifully fairly quiet, with quite a few with no plans and just mooching around in Eastbourne with the family. I’ve been struggling to hit Saturdays properly, mentally-speaking, and feel caught between doing all the stuff I wasn’t able to do during the week, taking some relaxation time, and being with the family – all of these have their own pressures and priorities, and my weekday routine of ordering and ticking off tasks doesn’t translate into downtime well. In other words, I can find it difficult to relax these days, which is frustrating.
Which isn’t helped by suffering from a batch of Tennis Elbow for the last month. It’s been niggling since a badminton malpractice injury back in February, but I managed to properly break it during an intense match a few weeks ago. It seems to have spread to my back and arms a bit too which is making me feel… Well, old. But at the same time, I also recognise that I’m not of the healthiest lifestyle, especially around the neck and shoulders. It’s a wake-up call to embed stretches and flexes into everyday life, not just a quick weekly warm-up before heading on to the court. It’s also been one heck of a year, so I think I need to find a way to come down from everything, and transition back to something calmer.
That said, I’ve been minimising my movement by digging into some cracking content recently. After moving house a few months ago, we finally upgraded our TV, which means the old one has now moved into the “snuddy” (or “snuggy”? it’s a cross between a study and a snug) and I’ve been able to play some big screen games again. In particular:
- I finished Rusty Lake: Roots. I’m trying to play through these in the recommended order, for context. Initially, I found Roots disappointing as the puzzles seemed simpler and shorter than previous games in the series. But this does allow space for actual character development and meta- puzzles reaching out into the second half, culminating and end and post-end game. I was invested enough by the finish line that I looked up some walkthroughs, got a few extraneous achievements, and read up on the back story (always a good sign). It’s also impressive to see just how much passion and thought goes into that realm.
- I’ve finally started properly on Zelda: Breath of the Wild. Yes, I know Echoes of Wisdom is just out, but TBH the son has started getting into it, and I’m quite happy being 10 years behind everyone else anyway. I originally tried BotW on the Wii U, but it’s been a very busy 13 years and only now do I find I have the patience to “go big game” again. And it’s big.
- I’ve returned to Kentucky Route Zero from having to stop a few months ago. This is nothing like what I expected – much more “cinematograph” than game. I’m actually enjoying it, but it’s a different mindset, a different part of the brain. In some ways it’s still a “guided tour” through a land akin to, say, a Zelda world. But it also requires some better memory of what’s happening, and enough time and ambience – on the viewer/player’s part – to get the most out of the experience. Hence cinematograph.
Less epicly, but still of mention, I’ve also been dabbling in this lot.
- Returned to Pinball FX3 (Switch) for some great casual flipper fun.
- STRAFTAT beta (Steam), a 1-v-1 twitchy shooter from the surreal-brutalist BABBDI peeps. I’m very bad at this so far.
- Bundle of Joy demo (Steam)from Nicholas O’Brien, a series of mini-games about the ups and downs of parenting a newborn.
- The Garden Path (Steam) which I kickstarted a long time ago while running the Beamspun newsletter. A gentle experience, for a few minutes of relaxing time.
- Dagon (Steam), an adaptation of an HP Lovecraft tale which is apparently faithful (I haven’t read the original). Nicely done, I’m tempted to pick up some of their extra paid-for adaptations.
- Power-wash simulator (Switch) – finally, during the weekend it was available for free, son 1 and I spent a merry hour just pointing hoses at garden furniture…
- Mosa Lina (Steam) – now with added (and hilarious) multiplayer mode, this was another one I’ve been enjoying with the kids. “Physics” meets absurd tools and unfair randomness, creating a silly but surprisingly addictive game. For under a fiver.
- The Space Between (Steam) – one from the backlog, and quite the experience! A dark tale, told with grainy skill, this one was a mature but pleasant surprise.
- Exo One (Steam), which I finally finished and should review separately. I took a lot of screen shots.
Reading-wise, I finally finished the Mortal Engines quadrilogy by Phillip Reeve, culminating with A Darkling Plain. I read the first installation when it first came out, I think? Later on, I picked up the digital edition of all four on the Kindle, and it sat, like a lot of digital content, gathering silver dust until a year or so again. I skim read the first, and carried on with the rest (despite apparently having forgotten that I’d already read the second, according to my Goodreads log). The whole thing was a good teenage fiction romp which is what I needed, really. There were a lot of strands which got tied up a bit too quickly at the end, and it felt like the world and the premise would have worked better as a more epic, more gritty series. The idea of moving, prowling, predator cities was initially exciting, but never got more exciting than in itself than the guts of London in the opening chapter. In short, I enjoyed it, but with that trying-too-much-to-be-a-film edge (as, indeed, the first book was to an under-enthusiastic reception).
I’m now making a start on House of Leaves by Mark Z. Danielewski, a much darker tome that is not so much recommended as referred to in the more obscura internet xircles that I haunt. Wish me luck.
(“Obscura” is not a typo, and feels like it should be an adjective. cf “obscura’d” and “obscuraed”; the process of revelation through mystery, darkness and enclosure from where a camera obscura gets its power.
“Xircles” is a typo, though. However, one that I like.)
October will be a busy one with many events and a good sense of productive work. It may make me or break me. With that in mind, I should set out some goals/aims/focuses/rituals/prayers/gemstones to act as supporting braces for my mental and physical health. Pay attention to the parts of you that tense up, that are tensed up. Breathe into them. Face them head on. Spend time with them like dying loved ones. Comfort them and nurture them and give them new dreams.
The winds are here, and they’re on your side. If you know how to accept help.
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